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holiday romance(惜只邪晩)-及1何蛍
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HOLIDAY ROMANCE
HOLIDAY ROMANCE ´
IN FOUR PARTS
By Charles Dickens
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HOLIDAY ROMANCE
PART I ´ INTRODUCTORY
ROMANCE PROM THE PEN OF
WILLIAM TINKLING�察�ESQ。 ��Aged
eight。��
THIS beginning´part is not made out of anybody's head�察�you know。 It's
real。 You must believe this beginning´part more than what comes after�察�
else you won't understand how what comes after came to be written。 You
must believe it all�察 �but you must believe this most�察 �please。 I am the
editor of it。 Bob Redforth ��he's my cousin�察 �and shaking the table on
purpose�� wanted to be the editor of it�察�but I said he shouldn't because he
couldn't。 HE has no idea of being an editor。
Nettie Ashford is my bride。 We were married in the right´hand closet
in the corner of the dancing´school�察 �where first we met�察 �with a ring ��a
green one�� from Wilkingwater's toy´shop。 I owed for it out of my
pocket´money。 When the rapturous ceremony was over�察�we all four went
up the lane and let off a cannon ��brought loaded in Bob Redforth's
waistcoat´pocket�� to announce our nuptials。 It flew right up when it went
off�察�and turned over。 Next day�察�Lieut。´ Col。 Robin Redforth was united�察�
with similar ceremonies�察�to Alice Rainbird。 This time the cannon burst
with a most terrific explosion�察�and made a puppy bark。
My peerless bride was�察 �at the period of which we now treat�察 �in
captivity at Miss Grimmer's。 Drowvey and Grimmer is the partnership�察�
and opinion is divided which is the greatest beast。 The lovely bride of the
colonel was also immured in the dungeons of the same establishment。 A
vow was entered into�察�between the colonel and myself�察�that we would cut
them out on the following Wednesday when walking two and two。
Under the desperate circumstances of the case�察�the active brain of the
colonel�察�combining with his lawless pursuit ��he is a pirate���察�suggested an
attack with fireworks。 This�察 �however�察 �from motives of humanity�察 �was
abandoned as too expensive。
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HOLIDAY ROMANCE
Lightly armed with a paper´knife buttoned up under his jacket�察 �and
waving the dreaded black flag at the end of a cane�察 �the colonel took
command of me at two P。M。 on the eventful and appointed day。 He had
drawn out the plan of attack on a piece of paper�察 �which was rolled up
round a hoop´stick。 He showed it to me。 My position and my full´
length portrait ��but my real ears don't stick out horizontal�� was behind a
corner lamp´post�察�with written orders to remain there till I should see Miss
Drowvey fall。 The Drowvey who was to fall was the one in spectacles�察�
not the one with the large lavender bonnet。 At that signal I was to rush
forth�察 �seize my bride�察 �and fight my way to the lane。 There a junction
would be effected between myself and the colonel�察�and putting our brides
behind us�察�between ourselves and the palings�察�we were to conquer or die。
The enemy appeared�察 � approached。 Waving his black flag�察 �the
colonel attacked。 Confusion ensued。 Anxiously I awaited my signal�察�
but my signal came not。 So far from falling�察 �the hated Drowvey in
spectacles appeared to me to have muffled the colonel's head in his
outlawed banner�察�and to be pitching into him with a parasol。 The one in
the lavender bonnet also performed prodigies of valour with her fists on
his back。 Seeing that all was for the moment lost�察�I fought my desperate
way hand to hand to the lane。 Through taking the back road�察 �I was so
fortunate as to meet nobody�察�and arrived there uninterrupted。
It seemed an age ere the colonel joined me。 He had been to the
jobbing tailor's to be sewn up in several places�察�and attributed our defeat to
the refusal of the detested Drowvey to fall。 Finding her so obstinate�察�he
had said to her�察�'Die�察�recreant��' but had found her no more open to reason
on that point than the other。
My blooming bride appeared�察�accompanied by the colonel's bride�察�at
the dancing´school next day。 What�拭 �Was her face averted from me�拭�
Hah�拭 �Even so。 With a look of scorn�察 �she put into my hand a bit of
paper�察�and took another partner。 On the paper was pencilled�察�'Heavens� �
Can I write the word�拭 �Is my husband a cow��'
In the first bewilderment of my heated brain�察 �I tried to think what
slanderer could have traced my family to the ignoble animal mentioned
above。 Vain were my endeavours。 At the end of that dance I whispered
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HOLIDAY ROMANCE
the colonel to come into the cloak´room�察�and I showed him the note。
'There is a syllable wanting��' said he�察�with a gloomy brow。
'Hah� �What syllable��' was my inquiry。
'She asks�察�can she write the word�拭 �And no�察�you see she couldn't��' said
the colonel�察�pointing out the passage。
'And the word was��' said I。
'Cow ´ cow ´ coward��' hissed the pirate´colonel in my ear�察�and gave me
back the note。
Feeling that I must for ever tread the earth a branded boy�察 � person I
mean�察 � or that I must clear up my honour�察�I demanded to be tried by a
court´martial。 The colonel admitted my right to be tried。 Some
difficulty was found in composing the court�察�on account of the Emperor of
France's aunt refusing to let him come out。 He was to be the president。
Ere yet we had appointed a substitute�察�he made his escape over the back´
wall�察�and stood among us�察�a free monarch。
The court was held on the grass by the pond。 I recognised�察 �in a
certain admiral among my judges�察 �my deadliest foe。 A cocoa´nut had
given rise to language that I could not brook�察 �but confiding in my
innocence�察 �and also in the knowledge that the President of the United
States ��who sat next him�� owed me a knife�察�I braced myself for the ordeal。
It was a solemn spectacle�察 �that court。 Two executioners with
pinafores reversed led me in。 Under the shade of an umbrella I perceived
my bride�察 �supported by the bride of the pirate´colonel。 The president�察�
having reproved a little female ensign for tittering�察�on a matter of life or
death�察 �called upon me to plead�察 �'Coward or no coward�察 �guilty or not
guilty��' I pleaded in a firm tone�察�'No coward and not guilty。' ��The little
female ensign being again reproved by the president for misconduct�察�
mutinied�察�left the court�察�and threw stones。��
My implacable enemy�察 �the admiral�察 �conducted the case against me。
The colonel's bride was called to prove that I had remained behind the
corner lamp´post during the engagement。 I might have been spared the
anguish of my own bride's being also made a witness to the same point�察�
but the admiral knew where to wound me。 Be still�察�my soul�察�no matter。
The colonel was then brought forward with his evidence。
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HOLIDAY ROMANCE
It was for this point that I had saved myself up�察�as the turning´ point of
my case。 Shaking myself free of my guards�察 � who had no business to
hold me�察�the stupids�察�unless I was found guilty�察 � I asked the colonel what
he considered the first duty of a soldier�拭�Ere he could reply�察�the President
of the United States rose and informed the court�察�that my foe�察�the admiral�察�
had suggested 'Bravery��' and that prompting a witness wasn't fair。 The
president of the court immediately ordered the admiral's mouth to be filled
with leaves�察�and tied up with string。 I had the satisfaction of seeing the
sentence carried into effect before the proceedings went further。
I then took a paper from my trousers´pocket�察�and asked�察�'What do you
consider�察�Col。 Redford�察�the first duty of a soldier�拭 �Is it obedience��'
'It is��' said the colonel。
'Is that paper ´ please to look at it ´ in your hand��'
'It is��' said the colonel。
'Is it a military sketch��'
'It is��' said the colonel。
'Of an engagement��'
'Quite so��' said the colonel。
'Of the late engagement��'
'Of the late engagement。'
'Please to describe it�察�and then hand it to the president of the court。'
From that triumphant moment my sufferings and my dangers were at
an end。 The court rose up and jumped�察�on discovering that I had strictly
obeyed orders。 My foe�察�the admiral�察�who though muzzled was malignant
yet�察�contrived to suggest that I was dishonoured by having quitted the field。
But the colonel himself had done as much�察�and gave his opinion�察�upon his
word and honour as a pirate�察 �that
酔楯荷恬: 梓囚徒貧圭�鮗� ○ 賜 ★ 辛酔堀貧和鍬匈 梓囚徒貧議 Enter 囚辛指欺云慕朕村匈 梓囚徒貧圭�鮗� ● 辛指欺云匈競何!
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