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a treatise on parents and children-及2何蛍
酔楯荷恬: 梓囚徒貧圭�鮗� ○ 賜 ★ 辛酔堀貧和鍬匈 梓囚徒貧議 Enter 囚辛指欺云慕朕村匈 梓囚徒貧圭�鮗� ● 辛指欺云匈競何! 泌惚云慕短嗤堋響頼���誅卒亮茂�俊彭堋響��辛聞喘貧圭 "辺茄欺厘議箝誓匂" 孔嬬 才 "紗秘慕禰" 孔嬬��
designed to prevent parents from using their children ruthlessly to
make money for the household。 Such legislation has always been
furiously resisted by the parents�察�even when the horrors of factory
slavery were at their worst�察�and the extension of such legislation at
present would be impossible if it were not that the parents affected
by it cannot control a majority of votes in Parliament。 In domestic
life a great deal of service is done by children�察�the girls acting as
nursemaids and general servants�察�and the lads as errand boys。 In the
country both boys and girls do a substantial share of farm labor。
This is why it is necessary to coerce poor parents to send their
children to school�察�though in the relatively small class which keeps
plenty of servants it is impossible to induce parents to keep their
children at home instead of paying schoolmasters to take them off
their hands。
It appears then that the bond of affection between parents and
children does not save children from the slavery that denial of rights
involves in adult political relations。 It sometimes intensifies it��
sometimes mitigates it�察�but on the whole children and parents confront
one another as two classes in which all the political power is on one
side�察�and the results are not at all unlike what they would be if
there were no immediate consanguinity between them�察�and one were white
and the other black�察�or one enfranchised and the other
disenfranchised�察�or one ranked as gentle and the other simple。 Not
that Nature counts for nothing in the case and political rights for
everything。 But a denial of political rights�察�and the resultant
delivery of one class into the mastery of another�察�affects their
relations so extensively and profoundly that it is impossible to
ascertain what the real natural relations of the two classes are until
this political relation is abolished。
What is a Child��
An experiment。 A fresh attempt to produce the just man made perfect��
that is�察�to make humanity divine。 And you will vitiate the experiment
if you make the slightest attempt to abort it into some fancy figure
of your own�此 �for example�察�your notion of a good man or a womanly
woman。 If you treat it as a little wild beast to be tamed�察�or as a
pet to be played with�察�or even as a means to save you trouble and to
make money for you ��and these are our commonest ways���察�it may fight
its way through in spite of you and save its soul alive�察�for all its
instincts will resist you�察�and possibly be strengthened in the
resistance�察�but if you begin with its own holiest aspirations�察�and
suborn them for your own purposes�察�then there is hardly any limit to
the mischief you may do。 Swear at a child�察�throw your boots at it��
send it flying from the room with a cuff or a kick�察�and the experience
will be as instructive to the child as a difficulty with a
short´tempered dog or a bull。 Francis Place tells us that his father
always struck his children when he found one within his reach。 The
effect on the young Places seems to have been simply to make them keep
out of their father's way�察�which was no doubt what he desired�察�as far
as he desired anything at all。 Francis records the habit without
bitterness�察�having reason to thank his stars that his father respected
the inside of his head whilst cuffing the outside of it�察�and this made
it easy for Francis to do yeoman's service to his country as that rare
and admirable thing�察�a Freethinker�此 �the only sort of thinker�察�I may
remark�察�whose thoughts�察�and consequently whose religious convictions��
command any respect。
Now Mr Place�察�senior�察�would be described by many as a bad father�察�and
I do not contend that he was a conspicuously good one。 But as
compared with the conventional good father who deliberately imposes
himself on his son as a god�察�who takes advantage of childish credulity
and parent worship to persuade his son that what he approves of is
right and what he disapproves of is wrong�察�who imposes a corresponding
conduct on the child by a system of prohibitions and penalties��
rewards and eulogies�察�for which he claims divine sanction�此 �compared
to this sort of abortionist and monster maker�察�I say�察�Place appears
almost as a Providence。 Not that it is possible to live with children
any more than with grown´up people without imposing rules of conduct
on them。 There is a point at which every person with human nerves has
to say to a child ;Stop that noise。; But suppose the child asks why��
There are various answers in use。 The simplest�此 �Because it
irritates me�察─�may fail�察�for it may strike the child as being rather
amusing to irritate you�察�also the child�察�having comparatively no
nerves�察�may be unable to conceive your meaning vividly enough。 In any
case it may want to make a noise more than to spare your feelings。
You may therefore have to explain that the effect of the irritation
will be that you will do something unpleasant if the noise continues。
The something unpleasant may be only a look of suffering to rouse the
child's affectionate sympathy ��if it has any���察�or it may run to
forcible expulsion from the room with plenty of unnecessary violence��
but the principle is the same�此 �there are no false pretences involved��
the child learns in a straightforward way that it does not pay to be
inconsiderate。 Also�察�perhaps�察�that Mamma�察�who made the child learn
the Sermon on the Mount�察�is not really a Christian。
The Sin of Nadab and Abihu
But there is another sort of answer in wide use which is neither
straightforward�察�instructive�察�nor harmless。 In its simplest form it
substitutes for ;Stop that noise�察─ �Dont be naughty�察─�which means that
the child�察�instead of annoying you by a perfectly healthy and natural
infantile procedure�察�is offending God。 This is a blasphemous lie�察�and
the fact that it is on the lips of every nurserymaid does not excuse
it in the least。 Dickens tells us of a nurserymaid who elaborated it
into ;If you do that�察�angels wont never love you。; I remember a
servant who used to tell me that if I were not good�察�by which she
meant if I did not behave with a single eye to her personal
convenience�察�the cock would come down the chimney。 Less imaginative
but equally dishonest people told me I should go to hell if I did not
make myself agreeable to them。 Bodily violence�察�provided it be the
hasty expression of normal provoked resentment and not vicious
cruelty�察�cannot harm a child as this sort of pious fraud harms it。
There is a legal limit to physical cruelty�察�and there are also human
limits to it。 There is an active Society which brings to book a good
many parents who starve and torture and overwork their children�察�and
intimidates a good many more。 When parents of this type are caught��
they are treated as criminals�察�and not infrequently the police have
some trouble to save them from being lynched。 The people against whom
children are wholly unprotected are those who devote themselves to the
very mischievous and cruel sort of abortion which is called bringing
up a child in the way it should go。 Now nobody knows the way a child
should go。 All the ways discovered so far lead to the horrors of our
existing civilizations�察�described quite justifiably by Ruskin as heaps
of agonizing human maggots�察�struggling with one another for scraps of
food。 Pious fraud is an attempt to pervert that precious and sacred
thing the child's conscience into an instrument of our own
convenience�察�and to use that wonderful and terrible power called Shame
to grind our own axe。 It is the sin of stealing fire from the altar��
a sin so impudently practised by popes�察�parents�察�and pedagogues�察�that
one can hardly expect the nurserymaids to see any harm in stealing a
few cinders when they are worrited。
Into the blackest depths of this violation of children's souls one can
hardly bear to look�察�for here we find pious fraud masking the
violation of the body by obscene cruelty。 Any parent or school
teacher who takes a secret and abominable delight in torture is
allowed to lay traps into which every child must fall�察�and then beat
it to his or her heart's content。 A gentleman once wrote to me and
said�察�with an obvious conviction that he was being most reasonable and
high minded�察�that the only thing he beat his children for was failure
in perfect obedience and perfect truthfulness。 On these attributes��
he said�察�he must insist。 As one of them is not a virtue at all�察�and
the other is the attribute of a god�察�one can imagine what the lives of
this gentleman's children would have been if it had been possible for
him to live down to his monstrous and foolish pretensions。 And yet he
might have written his letter to The Times ��he very nearly did�察�by the
way�� without incurring any danger of being removed to an asylum�察�or
even losing his reputation for taking a very proper view of his
parental duties。 And at least it was not a trivial view�察�nor an ill
meant one。 It was much more respectable than the general consensus of
opinion that if a school teacher can devise a question a child cannot
answer�察�or overhear it calling omega omeega�察�he or she may beat the
child viciously。 Only�察�the cruelty must be whitewashed by a moral
excuse�察�and a pretence of reluctance。 It must be for the child's
good。 The assailant must say ;This hurts me more than it hurts you。;
There must be hypocrisy as well as cruelty。 The injury to the child
would be far less if the voluptuary said frankly ;I beat you because I
like beating you�察�and I shall do it whenever I can contrive an excuse
for it。; But to represent this detestable lust to the child as Divine
wrath�察�and the cruelty as the beneficent act of God�察�which is exactly
what all our floggers do�察�is to add to the torture of the body�察�out of
which the flogger at least gets some pleasure�察�the maiming and
blinding of the child's soul�察�which can bring nothing but horror to
anyone。
酔楯荷恬: 梓囚徒貧圭�鮗� ○ 賜 ★ 辛酔堀貧和鍬匈 梓囚徒貧議 Enter 囚辛指欺云慕朕村匈 梓囚徒貧圭�鮗� ● 辛指欺云匈競何!
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