historia calamitatum-第5部分

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nishments。　No　sooner　had　I　learned　this　than　I　sent　her　to　a　convent　of　nuns　at　Argenteuil；　not　far　from　Paris；　where　she　herself　had　been　brought　up　and　educated　as　a　young　girl。　I　had　them　make　ready　for　her　all　the　garments　of　a　nun；　suitable　for　the　life　of　a　convent；　excepting　only　the　veil；　and　these　I　bade　her　put　on。

When　her　uncle　and　his　kinsmen　heard　of　this；　they　were　convinced　that　now　I　had　completely　played　them　false　and　had　rid　myself　forever　of　Heloise　by　forcing　her　to　become　a　nun。　Violently　incensed；　they　laid　a　plot　against　me；　and　one　night　while　I　all　unsuspecting　was　asleep　in　a　secret　room　in　my　lodgings；　they　broke　in　with　the　help　of　one　of　my　servants　whom　they　had　bribed。　There　they　had　vengeance　on　me　with　a　most　cruel　and　most　shameful　punishment；　such　as　astounded　the　whole　world；　for　they　cut　off　those　parts　of　my　body　with　which　I　had　done　that　which　was　the　cause　of　their　sorrow。　This　done；　straightway　they　fled；　but　two　of　them　were　captured　and　suffered　the　loss　of　their　eyes　and　their　genital　organs。　One　of　these　two　was　the　aforesaid　servant；　who　even　while　he　was　still　in　my　service；　had　been　led　by　his　avarice　to　betray　me。

CHAPTER　VIII
OF　THE　SUFFERING　OF　HIS　BODY
OF　HOW　HE　BECAME　A　MONK　IN　THE　MONASTERY　OF　ST。　DENIS　AND　HELOISE　A　NUN　AT　ARGENTEUIL
WHEN　morning　came　the　whole　city　was　assembled　before　my　dwelling。　It　is　difficult；　nay；　impossible；　for　words　of　mine　to　describe　the　amazement　which　bewildered　them；　the　lamentations　they　uttered；　the　uproar　with　which　they　harassed　me；　or　the　grief　with　which　they　increased　my　own　suffering。　Chiefly　the　clerics；　and　above　all　my　scholars；　tortured　me　with　their　intolerable　lamentations　and　outcries；　so　that　I　suffered　more　intensely　from　their　compassion　than　from　the　pain　of　my　wound。　In　truth　I　felt　the　disgrace　more　than　the　hurt　to　my　body；　and　was　more　afflicted　with　shame　than　with　pain。　My　incessant　thought　was　of　the　renown　in　which　I　had　so　much　delighted；　now　brought　low；　nay；　utterly　blotted　out；　so　swiftly　by　an　evil　chance。　I　saw；　too；　how　justly　God　had　punished　me　in　that　very　part　of　my　body　whereby　I　had　sinned。　I　perceived　that　there　was　indeed　justice　in　my　betrayal　by　him　whom　I　had　myself　already　betrayed；　and　then　I　thought　how　eagerly　my　rivals　would　seize　upon　this　manifestation　of　justice；　how　this　disgrace　would　bring　bitter　and　enduring　grief　to　my　kindred　and　my　friends；　and　how　the　tale　of　this　amazing　outrage　would　spread　to　the　very　ends　of　the　earth。

What　path　lay　open　to　me　thereafter？　How　could　I　ever　again　hold　up　my　head　among　men；　when　every　finger　should　be　pointed　at　me　in　scorn；　every　tongue　speak　my　blistering　shame；　and　when　I　should　be　a　monstrous　spectacle　to　all　eyes？　I　was　overwhelmed　by　the　remembrance　that；　according　to　the　dread　letter　of　the　law；　God　holds　eunuchs　in　such　abomination　that　men　thus　maimed　are　forbidden　to　enter　a　church；　even　as　the　unclean　and　filthy；　nay；　even　beasts　in　such　plight　were　not　acceptable　as　sacrifices。　Thus　in　Leviticus　（xxii。　24）　is　it　said：　〃Ye　shall　not　offer　unto　the　Lord　that　which　hath　its　stones　bruised；　or　crushed；　or　broken；　or　cut。〃　And　in　Deuteronomy　（xxiii。　1）；　〃He　that　is　wounded　in　the　stones；　or　hath　his　privy　member　cut　off；　shall　not　enter　into　the　congregation　of　the　Lord。〃

I　must　confess　that　in　my　misery　it　was　the　overwhelming　sense　of　my　disgrace　rather　than　any　ardour　for　conversion　to　the　religious　life　that　drove　me　to　seek　the　seclusion　of　the　monastic　cloister。　Heloise　had　already；　at　my　bidding；　taken　the　veil　and　entered　a　convent。　Thus　it　was　that　we　both　put　on　the　sacred　garb；　I　in　the　abbey　of　St。　Denis；　and　she　in　the　convent　of　Argenteuil；　of　which　I　have　already　spoken。　She；　I　remember　well；　when　her　fond　friends　sought　vainly　to　deter　her　from　submitting　her　fresh　youth　to　the　heavy　and　almost　intolerable　yoke　of　monastic　life；　sobbing　and　weeping　replied　in　the　words　of　Cornelia：

〃O　husband　most　noble　
Who　ne'er　shouldst　have　shared　my　couch！　Has　fortune　such　power　
To　smite　so　lofty　a　head？　Why　then　was　I　wedded　
Only　to　bring　thee　to　woe？　Receive　now　my　sorrow；　
The　price　I　so　gladly　pay。〃　
（Lucan；　〃Pharsalia；〃　viii。　94。）
With　these　words　on　her　lips　did　she　go　forthwith　to　the　altar；　and　lifted　therefrom　the　veil；　which　had　been　blessed　by　the　bishop；　and　before　them　all　she　took　the　vows　of　the　religious　life。　For　my　part；　scarcely　had　I　recovered　from　my　wound　when　clerics　sought　me　in　great　numbers；　endlessly　beseeching　both　my　abbot　and　me　myself　that　now；　since　I　was　done　with　learning　for　the　sake　of　pain　or　renown；　I　should　turn　to　it　for　the　sole　love　of　God。　They　bade　me　care　diligently　for　the　talent　which　God　had　committed　to　my　keeping　（Matthew；　xxv。　15）；　since　surely　He　would　demand　it　back　from　me　with　interest。　It　was　their　plea　that；　inasmuch　as　of　old　I　had　laboured　chiefly　in　behalf　of　the　rich；　I　should　now　devote　myself　to　the　teaching　of　the　poor。　Therein　above　all　should　I　perceive　how　it　was　the　hand　of　God　that　had　touched　me；　when　I　should　devote　my　life　to　the　study　of　letters　in　freedom　from　the　snares　of　the　flesh　and　withdrawn　from　the　tumultuous　life　of　this　world。　Thus；　in　truth；　should　I　become　a　philosopher　less　of　this　world　than　of　God。
The　abbey；　however；　to　which　I　had　betaken　myself　was　utterly　worldly　and　in　its　life　quite　scandalous。　The　abbot　himself　was　as　far　below　his　fellows　in　his　way　of　living　and　in　the　foulness　of　his　reputation　as　he　was　above　them　in　priestly　rank。　This　intolerable　state　of　things　I　often　and　vehemently　denounced；　sometimes　in　private　talk　and　sometimes　publicly；　but　the　only　result　was　that　I　made　myself　detested　of　them　all。　They　gladly　laid　hold　of　the　daily　eagerness　of　my　students　to　hear　me　as　an　excuse　whereby　they　might　be　rid　of　me；　and　finally；　at　the　insistent　urging　of　the　students　themselves；　and　with　the　hearty　consent　of　the　abbot　and　the　rest　of　the　brotherhood；　I　departed　thence　to　a　certain　hut；　there　to　teach　in　my　wonted　way。　To　this　place　such　a　throng　of　students　flocked　that　the　neighbourhood　could　not　afford　shelter　for　them；　nor　the　earth　sufficient　sustenance。

Here；　as　befitted　my　profession；　I　devoted　myself　chiefly　to　lectures　on　theology；　but　I　did　not　wholly　abandon　the　teaching　of　the　secular　arts；　to　which　I　was　more　accustomed；　and　which　was　particularly　demanded　of　me。　I　used　the　latter；　however；　as　a　hook；　luring　my　students　by　the　bait　of　learning　to　the　study　of　the　true　philosophy；　even　as　the　Ecclesiastical　History　tells　of　Origen；　the　greatest　of　all　Christian　philosophers。　Since　apparently　the　Lord　had　gifted　me　with　no　less　persuasiveness　in　expounding　the　Scriptures　than　in　lecturing　on　secular　subjects；　the　number　of　my　students　in　these　two　courses　began　to　increase　greatly；　and　the　attendance　at　all　the　other　schools　was　correspondingly　diminished。　Thus　I　aroused　the　envy　and　hatred　of　the　other　teachers。　Those　way　took　who　sought　to　belittle　me　in　every　possible　advantage　of　my　absence　to　bring　two　principal　charges　against　me：　first；　that　it　was　contrary　to　the　monastic　profession　to　be　concerned　with　the　study　of　secular　books；　and；　second；　that　I　had　presumed　to　teach　theology　without　ever　having　been　taught　therein　myself。　This　they　did　in　order　that　my　teaching　of　every　kind　might　be　prohibited；　and　to　this　end　they　continually　stirred　up　bishops；　archbishops；　abbots　and　whatever　other　dignitaries　of　the　Church　they　could　reach。

CHAPTER　IX
OF　HIS　BOOK　ON　THEOLOGY　AND　HIS　PERSECUTION　AT　THE　HANDS　OF　HIS　FELLOW　STUDENTS　OF　THE　COUNCIL　AGAINST　HIM
IT　SO　happened　that　at　the　outset　I　devoted　myself　to　analysing　the　basis　of　our　faith　through　illustrations　based　on　human　understanding；　and　I　wrote　for　my　students　a　certain　tract　on　the　unity　and　trinity　of　God。　This　I　did　because　they　were　always　seeking　for　rational　and　philosophical　explanations；　asking　rather　for　reasons　they　could　understand　than　for　mere　words；　saying　that　it　was　futile　to　utter　words　which　the　intellect　could　not　possibly　follow；　that　nothing　could　be　believed　unless　it　could　first　be　understood；　and　that　it　was　absurd　for　any　one　to　preach　to　others　a　thing　which　neither　he　himself　nor　those　whom　he　sought　to　teach　could　comprehend。　Our　Lord　Himself　maintained　this　same　thing　when　He　said：　〃They　are　blind　leaders　of　the　blind〃　（Matthew；　xv。　14）。

Now；　a　great　many　people　saw　and　read　this　tract；　and　it　became　exceedingly　popular；　its　clearness　appealing　particularly　to　all　who　sought　information　on　this　subject。　And　since　the　questions　involved　are　generally　considered　the　most　difficult　of　all；　their　complexity　is　taken　as　the　measure　of　the　subtlety　of　him　who　succeeds　in　answering　them。　As　a　result；　my　rivals　became　furiously　angry；　and　summoned　a　council　to　take　action　against　me；　the　chief　instigators　therein　being　my　two　intriguing　enemies　of　former　days；　Alberic　and　Lotulphe。　These　two；　now　that　both　William　and　Anselm；　our　erstwhile　teachers；　we're　dead；　were　greedy　to　reign　in　their　stead；　and；　so　to　speak；　to　succeed　them　as　heirs。　While　they　were　directing　the　school　at　Rheims；　they　managed　by　repeated　hints　to　stir　up　their　archbishop；　Rodolphe；　against　me；　for　the　purpose　of　holding　a　meeting；　or　rather　an　ecclesiastical　council；　at　Soissons；　provided　they　could　secure　the　approval　of　Conon；　Bishop　of　Praeneste；　at　that　time　papal　legate　in　France。　Their　plan　was　to　summon　me　to　be　present　at　this　council；　bringing　with　me　the　famous　book　I　had　written　regarding　the　Trinity。　In　all　this；　indeed；　they　were　successful；　and　the　thing　happened　according　to　their　wishes。

Before　I　reached　Soissons；　however；　these　two　rivals　of　mine　so　foully　slandered　me　with　both　the　clergy　and　the　public　that　on　the　day　of　my　arrival　the　people　came　near　to　stoning　me　and　the　few　students　of　mine　who　had　accompanied　me　thither。　The　cause　of　their　anger　was　that　they　had　been　led　to　believe　that　I　had　preached　and　written　to　prove　the　existence　of　three　gods。　No　sooner　had　I　reached　the　city；　therefore；　than　I　went　forthwith　to　the　legate；　to　him　I　submitted　my　book　for　examination　and　judgment；　declaring　that　if　I　had　written　anything　repugnant　to　the　Catholic　faith；　I　was　quite　ready　to　correct　it　or　otherwise　to　ma