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the diary of a nobody-及7何蛍
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August 16。 ´ Lupin positively refused to walk down the Parade with me because I was wearing my new straw helmet with my frock´coat。 I don't know what the boy is coming to。
August 17。 ´ Lupin not falling in with our views�察�Carrie and I went for a sail。 It was a relief to be with her alone�察�for when Lupin irritates me�察�she always sides with him。 On our return�察�he said�此 �Oh�察�you've been on the 'Shilling Emetic��' have you�拭 �You'll come to six´pennorth on the 'Liver Jerker' next。; I presume he meant a tricycle�察�but I affected not to understand him。
August 18。 ´ Gowing and Cummings walked over to arrange an evening at Margate。 It being wet�察�Gowing asked Cummings to accompany him to the hotel and have a game of billiards�察�knowing I never play�察�and in fact disapprove of the game。 Cummings said he must hasten back to Margate�察�whereupon Lupin�察�to my horror�察�said�此 �I'll give you a game�察�Gowing ´ a hundred up。 A walk round I the cloth will give me an appetite for dinner。; I said�此 �Perhaps Mister Gowing does not care to play with boys。; Gowing surprised me by saying�此 �Oh yes�察�I do�察�if they play well�察─�and they walked off together。
August 19�察�Sunday。 ´ I was about to read Lupin a sermon on smoking ��which he indulges in violently�� and billiards�察�but he put on his hat and walked out。 Carrie then read ME a long sermon on the palpable inadvisability of treating Lupin as if he were a mere child。 I felt she was somewhat right�察�so in the evening I offered him a cigar。 He seemed pleased�察�but�察�after a few whiffs�察�said�此 �This is a good old tup'ny ´ try one of mine�察─�and he handed me a cigar as long as it was strong�察�which is saying a good deal。
August 20。 ´ I am glad our last day at the seaside was fine�察�though clouded overhead。 We went over to Cummings' ��at Margate�� in the evening�察�and as it was cold�察�we stayed in and played games�察�Gowing�察�as usual�察�overstepping the mark。 He suggested we should play ;Cutlets�察─�a game we never heard of。 He sat on a chair�察�and asked Carrie to sit on his lap�察�an invitation which dear Carrie rightly declined。
After some species of wrangling�察�I sat on Gowing's knees and Carrie sat on the edge of mine。 Lupin sat on the edge of Carrie's lap�察�then Cummings on Lupin's�察�and Mrs。 Cummings on her husband's。 We looked very ridiculous�察�and laughed a good deal。
Gowing then said�此 �Are you a believer in the Great Mogul�拭─ �We had to answer all together�此 �Yes ´ oh�察�yes� ─。�three times��。 Gowing said�此 �So am I�察─�and suddenly got up。 The result of this stupid joke was that we all fell on the ground�察�and poor Carrie banged her head against the corner of the fender。 Mrs。 Cummings put some vinegar on�察�but through this we missed the last train�察�and had to drive back to Broadstairs�察�which cost me seven´and´sixpence。
CHAPTER VII。
Home again。 Mrs。 James' influence on Carrie。 Can get nothing for Lupin。 Next´door neighbours are a little troublesome。 Some one tampers with my diary。 Got a place for Lupin。 Lupin startles us with an announcement。
August 22。 ´ Home sweet Home again� �Carrie bought some pretty blue´wool mats to stand vases on。 Fripps�察�Janus and Co。 write to say they are sorry they have no vacancy among their staff of clerks for Lupin。
August 23。 ´ I bought a pair of stags' heads made of plaster´of´ Paris and coloured brown。 They will look just the thing for our little hall�察�and give it style�察�the heads are excellent imitations。 Poolers and Smith are sorry they have nothing to offer Lupin。
August 24。 ´ Simply to please Lupin�察�and make things cheerful for him�察�as he is a little down�察�Carrie invited Mrs。 James to come up from Sutton and spend two or three days with us。 We have not said a word to Lupin�察�but mean to keep it as a surprise。
August 25。 ´ Mrs。 James�察�of Sutton�察�arrived in the afternoon�察�bringing with her an enormous bunch of wild flowers。 The more I see of Mrs James the nicer I think she is�察�and she is devoted to Carrie。 She went into Carrie's room to take off her bonnet�察�and remained there nearly an hour talking about dress。 Lupin said he was not a bit surprised at Mrs。 James' VISIT�察�but was surprised at HER。
August 26�察�Sunday。 ´ Nearly late for church�察�Mrs。 James having talked considerably about what to wear all the morning。 Lupin does not seem to get on very well with Mrs。 James。 I am afraid we shall have some trouble with our next´door neighbours who came in last Wednesday。 Several of their friends�察�who drive up in dog´carts�察�have already made themselves objectionable。
An evening or two ago I had put on a white waistcoat for coolness�察�and while walking past with my thumbs in my waistcoat pockets ��a habit I have���察�one man�察�seated in the cart�察�and looking like an American�察�commenced singing some vulgar nonsense about ;I HAD THIRTEEN DOLLARS IN MY WAISTCOAT POCKET。; I fancied it was meant for me�察�and my suspicions were confirmed�察�for while walking round the garden in my tall hat this afternoon�察�a ;throw´down; cracker was deliberately aimed at my hat�察�and exploded on it like a percussion cap。 I turned sharply�察�and am positive I saw the man who was in the cart retreating from one of the bedroom windows。
August 27。 ´ Carrie and Mrs。 James went off shopping�察�and had not returned when I came back from the office。 Judging from the subsequent conversation�察�I am afraid Mrs。 James is filling Carrie's head with a lot of nonsense about dress。 I walked over to Gowing's and asked him to drop in to supper�察�and make things pleasant。
Carrie prepared a little extemporised supper�察�consisting of the remainder of the cold joint�察�a small piece of salmon ��which I was to refuse�察�in case there was not enough to go round���察�and a blanc´ mange and custards。 There was also a decanter of port and some jam puffs on the sideboard。 Mrs。 James made us play rather a good game of cards�察�called ;Muggings。; To my surprise�察�in fact disgust�察�Lupin got up in the middle�察�and�察�in a most sarcastic tone�察�said�此 �Pardon me�察�this sort of thing is too fast for me�察�I shall go and enjoy a quiet game of marbles in the back´garden。;
Things might have become rather disagreeable but for Gowing ��who seems to have taken to Lupin�� suggesting they should invent games。 Lupin said�此 �Let's play 'monkeys。'; He then led Gowing all round the room�察�and brought him in front of the looking´glass。 I must confess I laughed heartily at this。 I was a little vexed at everybody subsequently laughing at some joke which they did not explain�察�and it was only on going to bed I discovered I must have been walking about all the evening with an antimacassar on one button of my coat´tails。
August 28。 ´ Found a large brick in the middle bed of geraniums�察�evidently come from next door。 Pattles and Pattles can't find a place for Lupin。
August 29。 ´ Mrs。 James is making a positive fool of Carrie。 Carrie appeared in a new dress like a smock´frock。 She said ;smocking; was all the rage。 I replied it put me in a rage。 She also had on a hat as big as a kitchen coal´scuttle�察�and the same shape。 Mrs。 James went home�察�and both Lupin and I were somewhat pleased ´ the first time we have agreed on a single subject since his return。 Merkins and Son write they have no vacancy for Lupin。
October 30。 ´ I should very much like to know who has wilfully torn the last five or six weeks out of my diary。 It is perfectly monstrous� �Mine is a large scribbling diary�察�with plenty of space for the record of my everyday events�察�and in keeping up that record I take ��with much pride�� a great deal of pains。
I asked Carrie if she knew anything about it。 She replied it was my own fault for leaving the diary about with a charwoman cleaning and the sweeps in the house。 I said that was not an answer to my question。 This retort of mine�察�which I thought extremely smart�察�would have been more effective had I not jogged my elbow against a vase on a table temporarily placed in the passage�察�knocked it over�察�and smashed it。
Carrie was dreadfully upset at this disaster�察�for it was one of a pair of vases which cannot be matched�察�given to us on our wedding´ day by Mrs。 Burtsett�察�an old friend of Carrie's cousins�察�the Pommertons�察�late of Dalston。 I called to Sarah�察�and asked her about the diary。 She said she had not been in the sitting´room at all�察�after the sweep had left�察�Mrs。 Birrell ��the charwoman�� had cleaned the room and lighted the fire herself。 Finding a burnt piece of paper in the grate�察�I examined it�察�and found it was a piece of my diary。 So it was evident some one had torn my diary to light the fire。 I requested Mrs。 Birrell to be sent to me to´ morrow。
October 31。 ´ Received a letter from our principal�察�Mr。 Perkupp�察�saying that he thinks he knows of a place at last for our dear boy Lupin。 This�察�in a measure�察�consoles me for the loss of a portion of my diary�察�for I am bound to confess the last few weeks have been devoted to the record of disappointing answers received from people to whom I have applied for appointments for Lupin。 Mrs。 Birrell called�察�and�察�in reply to me�察�said�此 �She never SEE no book�察�much less take such a liberty as TOUCH it。;
I said I was determined to find out who did it�察�whereupon she said she would do her best to help me�察�but she remembered the sweep lighting the fire with a bit of the ECHO。 I requested the sweep to be sent to me to´morrow。 I wish Carrie had not given Lupin a latch´key�察�we never seem to see anything of him。 I sat up till past one for him�察�and then retired tired。
November 1。 ´ My entry yesterday about ;retired tired�察─�which I did not notice at the time�察�is rather funny。 If I were not so worried just now�察�I might have had a little joke about it。 The sweep called�察�but had the audacity to come up to the hall´door and lean his dirty bag of soot on the door´step。 He�察�however�察�was so polite�察�I could not rebuke him。 He said Sarah lighted the fire。 Unfortunately�察�Sarah heard this�察�for she was dusting the banisters�察�and she ran down�察�and flew into a temper with the sweep�察�causing a row on the front door´steps�察�which I would not have had happen for anything。 I ordered her about her business�察�and told the sweep I was sorry to have troubled him�察�and so I was�察�for the door´steps were covered with soot in consequence of his visit。 I would willingly give ten shillings to find o
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