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  get her lunch!just like she asked!and then couldn¨t possibly have 
  known that she¨d already eaten somewhere else�拭�What a bitch� �

  I nodded。 It was a phenomenal change of pace to have Emily actually 
  take my side for once�察�not to lecture me on all the ways I Just 
  Don¨t Get It。 But�察�wait� �It was too good to be true。 Like a sun that 
  falls out of the sky�察�leaving only pink and blue streaks where it 
  had shone seconds before�察�Emily¨s face flashed from angry to 
  contrite。 TheRunway Paranoid Turnaround。

  ^Remember what we talked about before�察�Andrea。 ̄ Oh�察�yes�察�here it 
  es。 RPT�察�twelve o¨clock。 ^She doesn¨t do it to hurt you。 She 
  doesn¨t mean anything by it。 She¨s just way too important to get 
  held up on the little stuff。 So don¨t fight it。 Just throw out the 
  food�察�and let¨s move on。 ̄ Emily fixed her features in a determined 
  look and took a seat in front of her puter。 I knew she was 
  wondering right then and there if Miranda had had our outer office 
  areas bugged and had heard the whole thing。 She was red and 
  flustered and very obviously displeased with her lack of control。 I 
  didn¨t know how she had survived as long as she had。

  I thought about eating the steak myself�察�but the mere thought that 
  it had been on Miranda¨s desk only moments earlier made me feel 
  nauseated。 I took the tray to the kitchen and tilted it so every 
  single item would just slide directly into the garbage!all the 
  expertly cooked and seasoned food�察�the china plate�察�the metal butter 
  container�察�the salt box�察�the linen napkin�察�the silver�察�the steak 
  knife�察�and the Baccarat glass。 Gone。 All gone。 What did it matter�拭�
  I¨d get it all over again the next day�察�or whenever it was that she 
  may again be hungry for lunch。

  By the time I¨d made it to Drinkland�察�Alex looked annoyed and Lily 
  looked wasted。 I immediately wondered if Alex somehow knew that I¨d 
  been asked out on a date today�察�by a guy who was not only famous and 
  older�察�but also a plete and total dickhead。 Could he tell�拭�Did he 
  sense it�拭�Should I tell him�拭�No�察�no need to get into it with him 
  when it was so insignificant。 It wasn¨t like I was admitting to 
  being interested in some other guy�察�not like I would actually ever 
  act on it。 So there was nothing to gain by mentioning the 
  conversation at all。

  ^Hey there�察�fashion girl�察院�Lily slurred�察�waving her gin and tonic 
  toward me in a salute。 Some of it splashed down the front of her 
  cardigan�察�but she didn¨t seem to notice。 ^Or should I say�察�future 
  roomie�拭�Get a drink。 We need to have a toast� 院�It came out sounding 
  like ^toath。 ̄

  I kissed Alex and sat down next to him。

  ^Don¨t you look hot today� 院�he said�察�eyeing my Prada outfit 
  appreciatively。 ^When did this happen�拭�

  ^Oh�察�today。 Right around the time it was all but spelled out that if 
  I didn¨t fix my look I might not have a job anymore。 Pretty 
  insulting stuff�察�but I have to say�察�if you¨ve got to put something 
  on every day�察�this stuff isn¨t half bad。

  ^Hey�察�listen�察�guys。 I¨m really�察�really sorry I¨m late。 The Book took 
  forever tonight�察�and as soon as I dropped it off at Miranda¨s she 
  had me run to the corner deli and pick up some basil。 ̄

  ^I thought you said she had a cook�察院�Alex pointed out。 ^Why couldn¨t 
  he do it�拭�

  ^She does indeed have a cook。 She also has a housekeeper�察�a nanny�察�
  and two children。 So I have no idea why I was the one sent out for 
  dinner spices。 It was especially annoying since Fifth Avenue doesn¨t 
  have any corner delis�察�and neither does Madison or Park�察�so I had to 
  go all the way to Lex to find one。 But�察�of course�察�they didn¨t sell 
  basil�察�so I had to walk up nine blocks until I found an open 
  D¨Agostino¨s。 It took me an extra forty´five minutes。 I should just 
  expense a fucking spice rack and start traveling with it wherever I 
  go。 But let me tell you�察�those were a really�察�really worthwhile 
  forty´five minutes� �I mean�察�think of how much I learned shopping for 
  that basil�察�how better prepared I am for my future in magazines� �I¨m 
  on the fast track to being an editor now� 院�I flashed a winning 
  smile。

  ^To your future� 院�Lily cried�察�not detecting a single hint of sarcasm 
  in my diatribe。

  ^She¨s so far gone�察院�Alex said quietly�察�watching Lily with the look 
  of someone watching a sick relative sleep in a hospital bed。 ^I got 
  here on time with Max�察�who already left�察�but she must¨ve been here 
  for hours already。 Either that�察�or she drinks really fast。 ̄

  Lily had always been a big drinker�察�but it wasn¨t weird�察�because 
  Lily was a big everything。 She was the first one to smoke pot in 
  junior high and the first one to lose her virginity in high school 
  and the first to go skydiving in college。 She loved anyone and 
  anything that didn¨t love her back�察�so long as it made herfeel 
  alive。

  ^I just don¨t understand how you can sleep with him when you know 
  he¨s never going to break up with his girlfriend�察院�I¨d said about a 
  guy she¨d been secretly seeing our junior year。

  ^I just don¨t understand how you can play by so many rules�察院�she¨d 
  shot back instantly。 ^Where¨s the fun in all your perfectly planned�察�
  mapped´out�察�rule´filled life�拭�Live a little�察�Andy� �Feel something� �
  It¨s good to be alive� �

  Maybe she had been drinking a little more lately�察�but I knew that 
  her first´year studies were incredibly stressful�察�even for her�察�and 
  that her professors at Columbia were more demanding and less 
  understanding than the ones she¨d had wrapped around her finger at 
  Brown。It might not be a bad idea�察�I thought�察�signaling to the 
  waitress。 Maybe drinking was the way to handle it。 I ordered an 
  Absolut and grapefruit juice and took a long�察�deep swig。 It made me 
  feel more sick than anything�察�because I still hadn¨t had time to eat 
  anything except the raisins and the Diet Coke Emily had scraped 
  together for me earlier that day。

  ^I¨m sure she¨s just had a rough couple of weeks in school�察院�I said 
  to Alex as though Lily weren¨t sitting with us。 She didn¨t notice we 
  were talking about her because she was preoccupied giving some 
  yuppie guy at the bar heavy´lidded�察�e´hither looks。 Alex put his 
  arm around me and I snuggled closer on the couch。 It felt so good to 
  be near him again!it seemed like it had been weeks。

  ^I hate to be a buzz´kill�察�but I really have to get Home�察院�Alex 
  said�察�pushing my hair back behind my ear。 ^Will you be OK with her�拭�

  ^You have to leave�拭�Already�拭�

  ^Already�拭�Andy�察�I¨ve been here watching your best friend drink for 
  the past two hours。 I came to see you�察�but you weren¨t here。 And now 
  it¨s almost midnight�察�and I still have essays to correct。 ̄ He said 
  it calmly�察�but I could see that he was upset。

  ^I know�察�I¨m sorry about that�察�I really am。 You know that I would¨ve 
  been there if I could¨ve helped it at all。 You know that! ̄

  ^I do know all that。 I¨m not saying you did anything wrong or that 
  you could¨ve done anything differently。 I understand。 But try to 
  understand where I¨m ing from�察�too�察�OK�拭�

  I nodded and kissed him�察�but I felt awful。 I pledged to make it up 
  to him�察�to pick a night and plan something really special for just 
  the two of us。 He did�察�after all�察�put up with a lot from me。

  ^So�察�you won¨t even stay over tonight�拭院�I asked hopefully。

  ^Not unless you need help with Lily。 I really need to get Home and 
  work on those papers。 ̄ He hugged me good´bye�察�kissed Lily on the 
  cheek�察�and headed toward the door。 ^Call me if you need me�察院�he said 
  as he walked out。

  ^Hey�察�why¨d Alex leave�拭院�Lily asked�察�even though she¨d been sitting 
  there through the entire conversation。 ^Is he mad at you�拭�

  ^Probably�察院�I sighed�察�hugging my canvas messenger bag to my chest。 
  ^I¨ve been a shit to him lately。 ̄ I went to the bar to ask for an 
  appetizer menu and by the time I came back�察�the Wall Street guy had 
  curled up on the couch next to Lily。 He looked to be in his late 
  twenties�察�but his receding hairline made it impossible to know for 
  sure。

  I grabbed her coat and tossed it at her。 ^Lily�察�put that on。 We¨re 
  leaving�察院�I said while looking at him。 He was on the shorter side�察�
  and his pleated khakis didn¨t help his pudgy figure。 And the fact 
  that his tongue was now two inches from my best friend¨s ear didn¨t 
  make me like him any more。

  ^Hey�察�what¨s the rush�拭院�he asked in a whiny�察�nasal voice。 ^Your 
  friend and I are just getting to know each other。 ̄ Lily grinned and 
  nodded�察�trying to take a gulp from her drink but not realizing her 
  glass was empty。

  ^Well�察�that¨s very sweet�察�but it¨s time for us to go。 What¨s your 
  name�拭�

  ^Stuart。 ̄

  ^Nice to meet you�察�Stuart。 Why don¨t you give Lily here your number 
  and she can give you a call when she¨s feeling a little better!or 
  not。 How does that sound�拭院�I flashed him a smile。

  ^Uh�察�whatever。 No worries。 I¨ll catch you guys later。 ̄ He was on his 
  feet and headed to the bar so fast that Lily hadn¨t yet noticed he¨d 
  left。

  ^Stuart and I are getting to know each other�察�aren¨t we�察�Stu�拭院�She 
  turned to the place where he had sat and looked confused。

  ^Stuart had to run�察�Lil。 e on�察�let¨s get out of here。 ̄

  I pulled her drab green peacoat on over her sweater and yanked her 
  to her feet�察�where she swayed precariously until she regained her 
  balance。 The air outside was searing and cold and I figured it¨d 
  help her sober up。

  ^I don¨t feel so good。 ̄ She was slurring again。

  ^I know�察�sweetie�察�I know。 Let¨s get a cab back to your apartment�察�
  OK�拭�Do you think you can make it�拭�

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