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a treatise on parents and children-及15何蛍
酔楯荷恬: 梓囚徒貧圭�鮗� ○ 賜 ★ 辛酔堀貧和鍬匈 梓囚徒貧議 Enter 囚辛指欺云慕朕村匈 梓囚徒貧圭�鮗� ● 辛指欺云匈競何! 泌惚云慕短嗤堋響頼���誅卒亮茂�俊彭堋響��辛聞喘貧圭 "辺茄欺厘議箝誓匂" 孔嬬 才 "紗秘慕禰" 孔嬬��
they complain of harsh treatment。 Gratuities are voted�察�indulgences
and holidays are pleaded for�察�delinquencies are excused in the most
sentimental manner provided only the employee�察�however patent a
hypocrite or incorrigible a slacker�察�is hat in hand。 But let the most
obvious measure of justice be demanded by the secretary of a Trade
Union in terms which omit all expressions of subservience�察�and it is
with the greatest difficulty that the cooler´headed can defeat angry
motions that the letter be thrown into the waste paper basket and the
committee proceed to the next business。
The Demagogue's Opportunity
And the employee has in him the same fierce impulse to impose his will
without respect for the will of others。 Democracy is in practice
nothing but a device for cajoling from him the vote he refuses to
arbitrary authority。 He will not vote for Coriolanus�察�but when an
experienced demagogue comes along and says�察 �Sir�此 �_you_ are the
dictator�此 �the voice of the people is the voice of God�察�and I am only
your very humble servant�察─�he says at once�察 �All right�此 �tell me what
to dictate�察─�and is presently enslaved more effectually with his own
silly consent than Coriolanus would ever have enslaved him without
asking his leave。 And the trick by which the demagogue defeats
Coriolanus is played on him in his turn by _his_ inferiors。
Everywhere we see the cunning succeeding in the world by seeking a
rich or powerful master and practising on his lust for subservience。
The political adventurer who gets into parliament by offering himself
to the poor voter�察�not as his representative but as his will´less
soulless ;delegate�察─�is himself the dupe of a clever wife who
repudiates Votes for Women�察�knowing well that whilst the man is
master�察�the man's mistress will rule。 Uriah Heep may be a crawling
creature�察�but his crawling takes him upstairs。
Thus does the selfishness of the will turn on itself�察�and obtain by
flattery what it cannot seize by open force。 Democracy becomes the
latest trick of tyranny�此 �womanliness; becomes the latest wile of
prostitution。
Between parent and child the same conflict wages and the same
destruction of character ensues。 Parents set themselves to bend the
will of their children to their ownto break their stubborn spirit��
as they call itwith the ruthlessness of Grand Inquisitors。 Cunning��
unscrupulous children learn all the arts of the sneak in circumventing
tyranny�此 �children of better character are cruelly distressed and more
or less lamed for life by it。
Our Quarrelsomeness
As between adults�察�we find a general quarrelsomeness which makes
political reform as impossible to most Englishmen as to hogs。 Certain
sections of the nation get cured of this disability。 University men��
sailors�察�and politicians are comparatively free from it�察�because the
communal life of the University�察�the fact that in a ship a man must
either learn to consider others or else go overboard or into irons��
and the habit of working on committees and ceasing to expect more of
one's own way than is included in the greatest common measure of the
committee�察�educate the will socially。 But no one who has ever had to
guide a committee of ordinary private Englishmen through their first
attempts at collective action�察�in committee or otherwise�察�can retain
any illusions as to the appalling effects on our national manners and
character of the organization of the home and the school as petty
tyrannies�察�and the absence of all teaching of self´respect and
training in self´assertion。 Bullied and ordered about�察�the Englishman
obeys like a sheep�察�evades like a knave�察�or tries to murder his
oppressor。 Merely criticized or opposed in committee�察�or invited to
consider anybody's views but his own�察�he feels personally insulted and
wants to resign or leave the room unless he is apologized to。 And his
panic and bewilderment when he sees that the older hands at the work
have no patience with him and do not intend to treat him as
infallible�察�are pitiable as far as they are anything but ludicrous。
That is what comes of not being taught to consider other people's
wills�察�and left to submit to them or to over´ride them as if they were
the winds and the weather。 Such a state of mind is incompatible not
only with the democratic introduction of high civilization�察�but with
the comprehension and maintenance of such civilized institutions as
have been introduced by benevolent and intelligent despots and
aristocrats。
We Must Reform Society before we can Reform Ourselves
When we come to the positive problem of what to do with children if we
are to give up the established plan�察�we find the difficulties so great
that we begin to understand why so many people who detest the system
and look back with loathing on their own schooldays�察�must helplessly
send their children to the very schools they themselves were sent to��
because there is no alternative except abandoning the children to
undisciplined vagabondism。 Man in society must do as everybody else
does in his class�此 �only fools and romantic novices imagine that
freedom is a mere matter of the readiness of the individual to snap
his fingers at convention。 It is true that most of us live in a
condition of quite unnecessary inhibition�察�wearing ugly and
uncomfortable clothes�察�making ourselves and other people miserable by
the heathen horrors of mourning�察�staying away from the theatre because
we cannot afford the stalls and are ashamed to go to the pit�察�and in
dozens of other ways enslaving ourselves when there are comfortable
alternatives open to us without any real drawbacks。 The contemplation
of these petty slaveries�察�and of the triumphant ease with which
sensible people throw them off�察�creates an impression that if we only
take Johnson's advice to free our minds from cant�察�we can achieve
freedom。 But if we all freed our minds from cant we should find that
for the most part we should have to go on doing the necessary work of
the world exactly as we did it before until we organized new and free
methods of doing it。 Many people believed in secondary co´education
��boys and girls taught together�� before schools like Bedales were
founded�此 �indeed the practice was common enough in elementary schools
and in Scotland�察�but their belief did not help them until Bedales and
St George's were organized�察�and there are still not nearly enough
co´educational schools in existence to accommodate all the children of
the parents who believe in co´education up to university age�察�even if
they could always afford the fees of these exceptional schools。 It
may be edifying to tell a duke that our public schools are all wrong
in their constitution and methods�察�or a costermonger that children
should be treated as in Goethe's Wilhelm Meister instead of as they
are treated at the elementary school at the corner of his street�察�but
what are the duke and the coster to do�拭 �Neither of them has any
effective choice in the matter�此 �their children must either go to the
schools that are�察�or to no school at all。 And as the duke thinks with
reason that his son will be a lout or a milksop or a prig if he does
not go to school�察�and the coster knows that his son will become an
illiterate hooligan if he is left to the streets�察�there is no real
alternative for either of them。 Child life must be socially
organized�此 �no parent�察�rich or poor�察�can choose institutions that do
not exist�察�and the private enterprise of individual school masters
appealing to a group of well´to´do parents�察�though it may shew what
can be done by enthusiasts with new methods�察�cannot touch the mass of
our children。 For the average parent or child nothing is really
available except the established practice�察�and this is what makes it
so important that the established practice should be a sound one�察�and
so useless for clever individuals to disparage it unless they can
organize an alternative practice and make it�察�too�察�general。
The Pursuit of Manners
If you cross´examine the duke and the coster�察�you will find that they
are not concerned for the scholastic attainments of their children。
Ask the duke whether he could pass the standard examination of
twelve´year´old children in elementary schools�察�and he will admit��
with an entirely placid smile�察�that he would almost certainly be
ignominiously plucked。 And he is so little ashamed of or
disadvantaged by his condition that he is not prepared to spend an
hour in remedying it。 The coster may resent the inquiry instead of
being amused by it�察�but his answer�察�if true�察�will be the same。 What
they both want for their children is the communal training�察�the
apprenticeship to society�察�the lessons in holding one's own among
people of all sorts with whom one is not�察�as in the home�察�on
privileged terms。 These can be acquired only by ;mixing with the
world�察─�no matter how wicked the world is。 No parent cares twopence
whether his children can write Latin hexameters or repeat the dates of
the accession of all the English monarchs since the Conqueror�察�but all
parents are earnestly anxious about the manners of their children。
Better Claude Duval than Kaspar Hauser。 Laborers who are
contemptuously anti´clerical in their opinions will send their
daughters to the convent school because the nuns teach them some sort
of gentleness of speech and behavior。 And peers who tell you that our
public schools are rotten through and through�察�and that our
Universities ought to be razed to the foundations�察�send their sons to
Eton and Oxford�察�Harrow and Cambridge�察�not only because there is
nothing else to be done�察�but because these places�察�though they turn
out blackguards and ignoramuses and boobies galore�察�turn them out with
the habits and manners of the society they belong to。 Bad as those
manners are in many respects�察�they are better than no manners at all。
And no individual
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