the gentle grafter-第15部分

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some　mileage　left　in　his　book；　and　that　took　him　as　far　as　the　town　in
the　wilderness　where　he　was　spilled　out　on　me　and　Bill　Bassett　as
Elijah　III。　with　not　a　raven　in　sight　for　any　of　us。

〃Then　this　Alfred　E。　Ricks　lets　out　a　squeak　that　he　is　hungry；　too；
and　denies　the　hypothesis　that　he　is　good　for　the　value；　let　alone　the
price；　of　a　meal。　And　so；　there　was　the　three　of　us；　representing；　if
we　had　a　mind　to　draw　syllogisms　and　parabolas；　labor　and　trade　and
capital。　Now；　when　trade　has　no　capital　there　isn't　a　dicker　to　be
made。　And　when　capital　has　no　money　there's　a　stagnation　in　steak　and
onions。　That　put　it　up　to　the　man　with　the　jimmy。

〃'Brother　bushrangers；'　says　Bill　Bassett；　'never　yet；　in　trouble；　did
I　desert　a　pal。　Hard　by；　in　yon　wood；　I　seem　to　see　unfurnished
lodgings。　Let　us　go　there　and　wait　till　dark。'

〃There　was　an　old；　deserted　cabin　in　the　grove；　and　we　three　took
possession　of　it。　After　dark　Bill　Bassett　tells　us　to　wait；　and　goes
out　for　half　an　hour。　He　comes　back　with　a　armful　of　bread　and
spareribs　and　pies。

〃'Panhandled　'em　at　a　farmhouse　on　Washita　Avenue；'　says　he。　'Eat；
drink　and　be　leary。'

〃The　full　moon　was　coming　up　bright；　so　we　sat　on　the　floor　of　the
cabin　and　ate　in　the　light　of　it。　And　this　Bill　Bassett　begins　to
brag。

〃'Sometimes；'　says　he；　with　his　mouth　full　of　country　produce；　'I　lose
all　patience　with　you　people　that　think　you　are　higher　up　in　the
profession　than　I　am。　Now；　what　could　either　of　you　have　done　in　the
present　emergency　to　set　us　on　our　feet　again？　Could　you　do　it；
Ricksy？'

〃'I　must　confess；　Mr。　Bassett；'　says　Ricks；　speaking　nearly　inaudible
out　of　a　slice　of　pie；　'that　at　this　immediate　juncture　I　could　not；
perhaps；　promote　an　enterprise　to　relieve　the　situation。　Large
operations；　such　as　I　direct；　naturally　require　careful　preparation　in
advance。　I'

〃'I　know；　Ricksy；'　breaks　in　Bill　Bassett。　'You　needn't　finish。　You
need　500　to　make　the　first　payment　on　a　blond　typewriter；　and　four
roomsful　of　quartered　oak　furniture。　And　you　need　500　more　for
advertising　contracts。　And　you　need　two　weeks'　time　for　the　fish　to
begin　to　bite。　Your　line　of　relief　would　be　about　as　useful　in　an
emergency　as　advocating　municipal　ownership　to　cure　a　man　suffocated
by　eighty…cent　gas。　And　your　graft　ain't　much　swifter；　Brother
Peters；'　he　winds　up。

〃'Oh；'　says　I；　'I　haven't　seen　you　turn　anything　into　gold　with　your
wand　yet；　Mr。　Good　Fairy。　'Most　anybody　could　rub　the　magic　ring　for　a
little　left…over　victuals。'

〃'That　was　only　getting　the　pumpkin　ready；'　says　Bassett；　braggy　and
cheerful。　'The　coach　and　six'll　drive　up　to　the　door　before　you　know
it；　Miss　Cinderella。　Maybe　you've　got　some　scheme　under　your　sleeve…
holders　that　will　give　us　a　start。'

〃'Son；'　says　I；　'I'm　fifteen　years　older　than　you　are；　and　young
enough　yet　to　take　out　an　endowment　policy。　I've　been　broke　before。　We
can　see　the　lights　of　that　town　not　half　a　mile　away。　I　learned　under
Montague　Silver；　the　greatest　street　man　that　ever　spoke　from　a　wagon。
There　are　hundreds　of　men　walking　those　streets　this　moment　with
grease　spots　on　their　clothes。　Give　me　a　gasoline　lamp；　a　dry…goods
box；　and　a　two…dollar　bar　of　white　castile　soap；　cut　into　little'

〃'Where's　your　two　dollars？'　snickered　Bill　Bassett　into　my　discourse。
There　was　no　use　arguing　with　that　burglar。

〃'No；'　he　goes　on；　'you're　both　babes…in…the…wood。　Finance　has　closed
the　mahogany　desk；　and　trade　has　put　the　shutters　up。　Both　of　you　look
to　labor　to　start　the　wheels　going。　All　right。　You　admit　it。　To…night
I'll　show　you　what　Bill　Bassett　can　do。'

〃Bassett　tells　me　and　Ricks　not　to　leave　the　cabin　till　he　comes　back；
even　if　it's　daylight；　and　then　he　starts　off　toward　town；　whistling
gay。

〃This　Alfred　E。　Ricks　pulls　off　his　shoes　and　his　coat；　lays　a　silk
handkerchief　over　his　hat；　and　lays　down　on　the　floor。

〃'I　think　I　will　endeavor　to　secure　a　little　slumber；'　he　squeaks。
'The　day　has　been　fatiguing。　Good…night；　my　dear　Mr。　Peters。'

〃'My　regards　to　Morpheus；'　says　I。　'I　think　I'll　sit　up　a　while。'

〃About　two　o'clock；　as　near　as　I　could　guess　by　my　watch　in　Peavine；
home　comes　our　laboring　man　and　kicks　up　Ricks；　and　calls　us　to　the
streak　of　bright　moonlight　shining　in　the　cabin　door。　Then　he　spreads
out　five　packages　of　one　thousand　dollars　each　on　the　floor；　and
begins　to　cackle　over　the　nest…egg　like　a　hen。

〃'I'll　tell　you　a　few　things　about　that　town；'　says　he。　'It's　named
Rocky　Springs；　and　they're　building　a　Masonic　temple；　and　it　looks
like　the　Democratic　candidate　for　mayor　is　going　to　get　soaked　by　a
Pop；　and　Judge　Tucker's　wife；　who　has　been　down　with　pleurisy；　is
getting　some　better。　I　had　a　talk　on　these　liliputian　thesises　before
I　could　get　a　siphon　in　the　fountain　of　knowledge　that　I　was　after。
And　there's　a　bank　there　called　the　Lumberman's　Fidelity　and　Plowman's
Savings　Institution。　It　closed　for　business　yesterday　with　23；000
cash　on　hand。　It　will　open　this　morning　with　18；000all　silver
that's　the　reason　I　didn't　bring　more。　There　you　are；　trade　and
capital。　Now；　will　you　be　bad？'

〃'My　young　friend；'　says　Alfred　E。　Ricks；　holding　up　his　hands；　'have
you　robbed　this　bank？　Dear　me；　dear　me！'

〃'You　couldn't　call　it　that；'　says　Bassett。　〃Robbing〃　sounds　harsh。
All　I　had　to　do　was　to　find　out　what　street　it　was　on。　That　town　is　so
quiet　that　I　could　stand　on　the　corner　and　hear　the　tumblers　clicking
in　that　safe　lock〃right　to　45；　left　twice　to　80；　right　once　to　60；
left　to　15〃as　plain　as　the　Yale　captain　giving　orders　in　the
football　dialect。　Now；　boys；'　says　Bassett；　'this　is　an　early　rising
town。　They　tell　me　the　citizens　are　all　up　and　stirring　before
daylight。　I　asked　what　for；　and　they　said　because　breakfast　was　ready
at　that　time。　And　what　of　merry　Robin　Hood？　It　must　be　Yoicks！　and
away　with　the　tinkers'　chorus。　I'll　stake　you。　How　much　do　you　want？
Speak　up。　Capital。'

〃'My　dear　young　friend；'　says　this　ground　squirrel　of　a　Ricks；
standing　on　his　hind　legs　and　juggling　nuts　in　his　paws；　'I　have
friends　in　Denver　who　would　assist　me。　If　I　had　a　hundred　dollars　I'

〃Basset　unpins　a　package　of　the　currency　and　throws　five　twenties　to
Ricks。

〃'Trade；　how　much？'　he　says　to　me。

〃'Put　your　money　up；　Labor；'　says　I。　'I　never　yet　drew　upon　honest
toil　for　its　hard…earned　pittance。　The　dollars　I　get　are　surplus　ones
that　are　burning　the　pockets　of　damfools　and　greenhorns。　When　I　stand
on　a　street　corner　and　sell　a　solid　gold　diamond　ring　to　a　yap　for
3。00；　I　make　just　2。60。　And　I　know　he's　going　to　give　it　to　a　girl
in　return　for　all　the　benefits　accruing　from　a　125。00　ring。　His
profits　are　122。00。　Which　of　us　is　the　biggest　fakir？'

〃'And　when　you　sell　a　poor　woman　a　pinch　of　sand　for　fifty　cents　to
keep　her　lamp　from　exploding；'　says　Bassett；　'what　do　you　figure　her
gross　earnings　to　be；　with　sand　at　forty　cents　a　ton？'

〃'Listen；'　says　I。　'I　instruct　her　to　keep　her　lamp　clean　and　well
filled。　If　she　does　that　it　can't　burst。　And　with　the　sand　in　it　she
knows　it　can't；　and　she　don't　worry。　It's　a　kind　of　Industrial
Christian　Science。　She　pays　fifty　cents；　and　gets　both　Rockefeller　and
Mrs。　Eddy　on　the　job。　It　ain't　everybody　that　can　let　the　gold…dust
twins　do　their　work。'

〃Alfred　E。　Ricks　all　but　licks　the　dust　off　of　Bill　Bassett's　shoes。

〃'My　dear　young　friend；'　says　he；　'I　will　never　forget　your
generosity。　Heaven　will　reward　you。　But　let　me　implore　you　to　turn
from　your　ways　of　violence　and　crime。'

〃'Mousie；'　says　Bill；　'the　hole　in　the　wainscoting　for　yours。　Your
dogmas　and　inculcations　sound　to　me　like　the　last　words　of　a　bicycle
pump。　What　has　your　high　moral；　elevator…service　system　of　pillage
brought　you　to？　Penuriousness　and　want。　Even　Brother　Peters；　who
insists　upon　contaminating　the　art　of　robbery　with　theories　of
commerce　and　trade；　admitted　he　was　on　the　lift。　Both　of　you　live　by
the　gilded　rule。　Brother　Peters；'　says　Bill；　'you'd　better　choose　a
slice　of　this　embalmed　currency。　You're　welcome。'

〃I　told　Bill　Bassett　once　more　to　put　his　money　in　his　pocket。　I　never
had　the　respect　for　burglary　that　some　people　have。　I　always　gave
something　for　the　money　I　took；　even　if　it　was　only　some　little　trifle
for　a　souvenir　to　remind　'em　not　to　get　caught　again。

〃And　then　Alfred　E。　Ricks　grovels　at　Bill's　feet　again；　and　bids　us
adieu。　He　says　he　will　have　a　team　at　a　farmhouse；　and　drive　to　the
station　below；　and　take　the　train　for　Denver。　It　salubrified　the
atmosphere　when　that　lamentable　boll…worm　took　his　departure。　He　was　a
disgrace　to　every　non…industrial　profession　in　the　country。　With　all
his　big　schemes　and　fine　offices　he　had　wound　up　unable　even　to　get　an
honest　meal　except　by　the　kindness　of　a　strange　and　maybe　unscrupulous
burglar。　I　was　glad　to　see　him　go；　though　I　felt　a　little　sorry　for
him；　now　that　he　was　ruined　forever。　What　could　such　a　man　do　without
a　big　capital　to　work　with？　Why；　Alfred　E。　Ricks；　as　we　left　him；　was
as　helpless　as　turtle　on　its　back。　He　couldn't　have　worked　a　scheme　to
beat　a　little　girl　out　of　a　penny　slate…pencil。

〃When　me　and　Bill　Bassett　was　left　alone　I　did　a　little　sleight…of…
mind　turn　in　my　head　with　a　trade　secret　at　the　end　of　it。　Thinks　I；
I'll　show　this　Mr。　Burglar　Man　the　difference　between　business　and
labor。　He　had　hurt　some　of　my　professional　self…adulation　by　casting
his　Persians　upon　commerce　and　trade。

〃'I　won't　take　any　of　your　money　as　a　gift；　Mr。　Bassett；'　says　I　to
him；　'but　if　you'll　pay　my　expenses　as　a　travelling　companion　until　we
get　out　of　the　danger　zone　of　the　immoral　deficit　you　have　caused　in
this　town's　finances　to…night；　I'll　be　obliged。'

〃Bill　Bassett　agreed　to　that；　and　we　hiked　westward　as　soon　as　we
could　catch　a　safe　train。

〃When　we　got　to　a　town　in　Arizona　called　Los　Perros　I　suggested　that
we　once　more　try　our　luck　on　terra…cotta。　That　was　the　home　of
Montague　Silver；　my　old　instructor；　now　retired　from　business。　I　knew
Monty　would　stake　me　to　web　money　if　I　could　show　him　a　fly　buzzing
'round　the　locality。　Bill　Bassett　said　all　towns　looked　alike　to　him
as　he　worked　mainly　in　the　dark。　So　we　got　off　the　train　in　Los
Perros；　a　fin